5 Steps You Must Take After Yelling At Your Kids
This is one of those topics that we don’t want to admit is true. Right? All is good in the world. I’m going to only post the happy pictures to my Facebook and Instagram accounts! However, it’s only a matter of time before our kids act like kids and misbehave. Or maybe they do something that just simply annoys us. And then it happens.
We yell at them. We snap at them. Inevitably, it happens. I can’t say that it’s okay, because it’s not. But it does happen, doesn’t it? Here are 5 steps you can take after yelling at your kids.
1. Apologize for how you acted
It’s not right. You know it. And yet, it still happens. We all make mistakes. But the key here is to apologize to your child immediately after. A sincere apology in which you are specific about your actions and why you are apologizing. It’s a humbling experience, but I want you to think how the child feels when we yell at them? It can’t be good. Sitting down with them and apologizing will start to heal those wounds.
2. Hug them
I can’t emphasize this enough. Give them hugs. Not just one hug. Many hugs! I love tickling my children, just to bring out laughter and smiles after an argument. There are many benefits to hugs and you will find yourself asking your child for another hug. And another hug. There is no such thing as too many hugs!
3. Tell them “I love you”
After a yelling episode at your children, it makes you feel like a pretty lousy parent. It’s important to verbalize to your child that you love them, especially after an argument. This will reinforce that you messed up and that they do have a safe place with their parents. You certainly don’t want to lose your child’s trust, so reiterating your love to them will maintain that trust in your relationship with them.
4. Do something fun together
Opinions may vary on this step. Depending on why you were yelling, maybe they need a timeout first. Or maybe you need to cool down and talk to them a little later about the situation. But for now, do something fun together, so you can re-connect with your child. This will show them that you love them and it will allow you time to smile and laugh so you can re-set from a frustrating experience only moments earlier. You could play a game with them, color a picture together, bake a fun treat for dessert, or go outside for a walk around the block.
5. Let It Go!
It can be easy to dwell on the negative events that happened in the course of a day. But don’t. Let this one go. Your child did something to upset you, so you yelled at them and if you followed the previous four steps, you are doing okay! Letting it go is important. I remember yelling at my daughter and a few hours later, she upset me again. I snapped at her and told her that she “always does this.” Ouch. I regret those words. Still do. That shows her that I never let the old situation go. What a parenting fail.
It’s easy as parents to throw around words but remember that those words hurt and can scar our children.
Don’t let that happen.